We have evolved in so many positive ways in the past decade. We have evolved technologically, scientifically and civilly, but have we evolved emotionally? Both men and women have become more emotionally liberated but I feel not all the effects are great. It seems we have trivialized love. This is coming from a person who doesn't know what love really is, well at least I don't know what it is to be in love with a man. Love is this amazing phenomenon, something that nobody can describe or prove yet somehow most of us all believe in it. Yet we don't treat it with much respect. We call other things by its name, we confuse it, use it liberally and blame awful things on it. This only makes it harder for younger people like myself understand love or trust it. Some part of me wants to find true love. In novels it's described as a connection that last a lifetime, a match that feels right from the moment you meet the person. It is described as accepting someone and wanting them even knowing their deepest secrets. Other people say you can't tell your loved one the whole truth if you want the relationship to work. You hear teenagers making out on a bench whispering "I love you". People say love is caring enough to give up your own happiness for that person. Of course others say that love will only end up in hurt, that it is awful and unforgiving. My boyfriend told me he loved me the first time we had sex and two weeks later broke up with me. I hadn't believed him at the time, I was afraid to, and I had guessed that he probably wasn't in the right mind at the time. Later he told me that he was sorry but he never did love me. That was the only time I ever wanted to tell someone I loved them…I thought maybe I did love him. I wanted him so much. Maybe the fact that he didn't want me had more to do with it than love. Or maybe losing my virginity had something to do with it, who knows? This just makes love so much more confusing and caused me to fear the word, to fear ever saying it or even implying it to other boyfriends. It makes me wonder if love even exists. How can I ask if love exists if I don't even know what love is. Love is just a word, without definition it doesn't mean anything. In fact love really has no definition, just a couple million years of connotation. To me love is like the last fairy tale I can't help believing in. I fear it but I can't stop hoping its real. To me love is finding someone who matches you mentally and emotionally. Its being physically and intellectually attracted to them. Wanted to make love to them as much as you want to sit in silence with, just to feel near them. Love is being able to want a person without being attached to them. It is feeling safe with a person, safe to tell the truth and be yourself. Love is growing along with a person, growing from each fight and each conversation. Love is giving to each other without needing to take. It would be wanting, not needing somebody.
Hollywood movies romanticize love. The entire movie will lead up to the coming together of two beautiful people, but once they declare their love for each other the movie ends. Although, our grown-up-movies don't end with the words "happily ever after" anymore, they still imply it. What happens after the honeymoon part is over? We seem so obsessed with the catch but aren't so good with the commitment. I don't know. I hope true love does exist, and I hope to someday to find someone who truly loves me. I hope that as a society we don't forget that there is a greater love possible.
What do you think love is??
